I am an Artist…What are you?


I bet most of you who know me didn’t know I am an artist.Well I am and last night I had my first show! Most of the paintings I had, I did in the last couple months just for fun without any real purpose at all, just felt the desire to paint and so well… I painted. Then I found outabout a group show being held by some fellow students from USM. I asked if I could also participate and it was on baby!

A little background story…Growing up I was artistic, or rather creative, but drawing wasn’t an obvious gift…yet. My teachers in elementary school told my parents to put me in art classes since they saw my creativity. I began numerous drawing classes so I could learn how to draw, but it wasn’t natural for me like some people who are just talented at recapturing exactly what they see. I found the whole process taxing and not fun at all, but I did enjoy putting the colors down after the drawings were finished. 

As I got older and saw this was now a talent of mine I was unsure how to really make the most of it since I didn’t believe it was a “natural” talent but rather something I learned how to do. I compared myself to natural artists and thought I can’t compete so why try. I stifled it for many years even though others kept telling me I was really good at it.

Another irrational belief I held was that artist don’t make money and I didn’t want to spend my life poor so I would try and pick other things that could be a “successful career” I ended up majoring in business management in college, graduated with good grades and found the whole thing terribly boring!

I hadn’t done much art since graduatig high school then this year in my grad program at USM decided to incorporate painting as part of my project as a way to be therapeutic and healing. I ended up really enjoying it since I was no longer forcing myself to draw and “get it right” just having fun doing what I wanted to do with the colors. It felt only natural and free. Every painting was an experiment and that’s how I approached it, no right or wrong just an experiment.

This is how I viewed the art show as well.  I didn’t feel any nerves or fear, I was just curious to see what others thought about what I already liked and that I had fun doing. I was really curious to see if anyone liked them enough to actually take it home with them. 

I got all sorts of rave and compliments from people; they were intrigued and wanted to know how I did it. All I got was love and appreciation and there was no doubt in my mind it was authentic. I felt grateful to hear this, yet in my mind I have done many things up to this point in my life that have been “talented” but haven’t produced much financial compensation in return.

Then at the end of the night someone bought two of my paintings. I ended up making more from those two paintings than any other single day or work in my life. I totally blew open my irrational belief that artists can’t make money, or that my talents are financially useless!

The way everything worked out was so graceful and easy and I can’t deny it felt like it was all meant to be, even the paintings, they also felt like they were meant to exist and have sort of always existed, and I just finally brought it into the physical world to be seen.

I know that money is not everything but I finally in a way feel validated, differently than I ever have before. The lesson I am taking away from this experience is this…when you feel the desire or curiosity to pursue something do it! If it is divine and part of your life path, doors will open and you follow those opportunities! The whole thing seemed effortless once I let my mind get out of the way and I just did what I enjoyed and shared that with other! So what have you been pushing away because you think it is a waste of time or no good? DO IT ANYWAY and then let me know how it goes!

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