Be a Conscious Observer

Stop. Take a breath. Slow down and observe your life.  We may be stuck in a trap or a dead end but unless you stop to reflect you may not catch it.  Do you feel alive? Do you feel energized and excited for your life each day when you wake up? If not stop and take a look!

It is so easy to get caught up in one thing and then the next. Never stopping to see how this is working or not working for us.  Each day we spend our energy at our jobs, in our relationships, to our community and religions. What is the fruit of your labor? What is the payoff? Is what you are doing working for you? How do you spend your energy with your thoughts and judgments? How is the way you are seeing the world and yourself working for you?

All these things can suck up your energy and hold you back from fulfilling your purpose and experiencing joy and happiness. Take a look at your life. Reflect and observe what is working for you and what isn’t then have the courage to make a new choice!

Do you feel stuck?

Posted by on Oct 9, 2011 in Welcome to the Process | No Comments

A few years back I found myself stuck. I had no idea what I wanted to do for a career. I had spent almost my entire life dedicated to soccer and this is what I was passionate about. After I was done playing in college I found myself in an interesting place. I had no idea what else I was passionate about. I couldn’t find it in anything! Panic soon set in and then despair, I was afraid I would never find something I was passionate for again. Then I decided to go on a mission for my church…the idea intrigued me, it seemed like a good adventure. That decision brought a whole new world of experiences, one of which was that I loved to see people’s lives improve. I saw I was passionate about this and this lead to discovering a career where I could continue to help people improve their lives…life coaching. I found my passion!

If you’ve lost your life’s true passion (or if you’re struggling desperately to find passion in the first place), don’t freak out! In fact, do the opposite and just relax. Let go of the pressure of trying to figure it out. In stead go try something different, some hobby or something you are simply curious about. When we follow our curiosity, it often times results in something magical. At the very least, it will keep you distracted while life sorts itself out and at the very most, your curiosity may surprise you. Before you even realize what’s happening, it may bring you to your passion, the thing you have been seeking for the whole time!

Turn a Fantasy Into a Reality

Posted by on Sep 19, 2011 in Welcome to the Process | No Comments

Here I am sharing my bedroom, almost a 30 year old grown woman! This is one of the sacrifices of my current reality to make happen what I want to make happen of being a life coach. I work as a waitress to pay for my tuition so no debt is accrued and manage what I can by eliminating expenses. But let me tell you I want so much more! I want a house, my own home to decorate how I want. With a cute little patio, maybe something near the beach! I catch myself fantasizing about this and always noticing “for sale” signs in front of houses I drive by. But as I mentioned before, the reality of my life is so far off from ever being able to buy a home…or is it?

A month ago I was overhearing one of the conversations of the table I was serving. They were talking business about some multi-million dollar homes foreclosing in Beverly Hills. I had this sudden realization. Here I am busting my butt to cover my expenses hoping to get a decent 20% tip from my table, which if I’m lucky will be over 20 bucks. I thought to myself why am I working so hard for just dollars? Why don’t I go work this hard in a bigger game and make thousands of dollars with the close of my sale? I mean I am in sales right? I’m just selling food…I need to sell something greater than food!

I want a house; I make nowhere near anything I need to in order to buy a house. Then I thought, “Well what is the next smallest thing I could do to get me one step closer to buying a house?” I thought I need to get a real estate license to learn how to buy a foreclosure. Then I would be making more money on commissions and I would be learning how to get what it is I want at a discount. But I didn’t know how to get my license. So I thought again, what is the next smallest step I could take to get my license?

I called a friend who has his and asked him how to do it. He told me to sign up for a class to prepare for the test. I thought okay I will do that “someday” when I have more time. But being the little life coach that I am, I know that “someday” never comes. I thought again, what is the next smallest thing I could do to get myself into a real estate class right now? I decided the next smallest thing I could do was to just sign up for one online so I could work at my own pace with my demanding schedule. Once I was signed up I hoped that would give me the motivation to get it done (within the next year before it expires and I have to repay again).

Here is the most amazing part. I have signed up, and actually began studying. I am one fourth of the way through the course and it has only been a few weeks. My reality now is to get my license before the year is over. Get hired by some agency after the New Year, and within a year make money selling real estate! I’m playing a bigger game now baby! Then within five years have enough money from commissions to buy my house and within 10 years have my house paid off! Look at that… what was once a fantasy has become an actual plan. I needed the vision for the big picture for inspiration. Then set up little goals in between to get me to arrive at the vision. The whole time just asking, “What is the next smallest step I can take get me closer to my dream?” Once one step was taken, things became a little clearer and a little more close to being what I want my reality to be.

So I ask you…what do you want and what is one small step you can take to get closer to having it be your reality?

When was the last time you took a risk?


Last year I enrolled myself in two beginning improvisational acting classes, not because I want to be an actor or anything like that but I just wanted to get out of my own head and do something I have never done before! I definitely didn’t master the art of improv, but I did have fun and felt a rush of adrenaline in every single class, and most of all laughed myself silly! It was worth every penny to take that risk (it looks like I am due for another risk, seeing as how this happened last year)!

There is something about taking risks that makes you feel alive. Risks are pretty simple you either win or lose: no question about it. The result is not really so important, but the act of actually taking the risk is where the reward lies.

When we take risks we get closer to reaching our heart’s desires. It doesn’t matter in what area you take a risk in either, taking risks leads to more risk taking. If you want to run a marathon but take a risk to travel to Europe by yourself, you also increase your chances to run that marathon. One risk increases the chances of actually doing the other. It gives us confidence to do something different. To challenge our previous paradigm of how we are and how we have to be.

When was the last time you took a risk? What do you want? You want to be an actor? You want to start a business? You want to get married? Great! Whatever it is go out and do anything that seems risky! Ask that pretty girl out, take that acting class, interview that CEO, do anything that requires courage. Get out there and do it! Even just the smaller risks will boost your confidence to take on the bigger ones! My friends as far as we know this life is it, what are you making of it? Are you excited? If not for Heaven’s sake do something different!

The Ups and Downs

Posted by on Jul 13, 2011 in Welcome to the Process | No Comments

You know in life some things work out and some things don’t. I was just interviewing to work with a therapist, author and coach who is doing exactly what I want to do, I was so excited to be a candidate to work with her. As it turned out I was not chosen for the position. At first I was very disappointed and even depressed for a moment. I let myself be down for about 20 minutes, then snapped out of it as I thought about it from another angle.

If I didn’t get this, there must be something better around the corner. I must remain available for the next best thing. When one thing doesn’t work out whether it be a job, school, a relationship, just know, that was for sure not what you were supposed to be doing at this moment. There is something else that is in the mix, someone else you are meant to be with. We don’t ever have to stay down thinking that was our one shot, that was our golden ticket. NO! There will be more, there will be hundreds more. Life is full of new beginnings, in fact everyday is a new beginning. We are never stuck or damned. Not unless you say you are. So my friends onward and upward, when one door closes another one is sure to open, keep the faith strong and know this wasn’t it because something better awaits you! Thank you for reading my words, I send you love on your journey.

Somebody Please

So my retail experience was short lived…about a month long. Before I quit however Tejah and I made a video at work the other day. The best part is we shot this while I was actually working! Which only shows you how true it is! Enjoy this fun little piece inspired by my real (awesome) life! Starring Tejah Signori, Davia King, photographed by Davia King, edited by Tejah Signori. Music by Sister Rogers.

You need to install or upgrade Flash Player to view this content, install or upgrade by clicking here.

If that doesn’t work you can watch it here Somebody Please .

Comfort vs. Your Dream

I am about to get up in front of two thousand people and speak. My heart is beating, I start to sweat and my leg won’t stop shaking. I take a deep breath and say to myself, “Davia, you can do this, you have done it before, you can do it again!”

As I begin to talk and hear my voice throughout the auditorium I forget all that fear and am just present in that moment, simply speaking. After I sit down it is a whole other experience. I feel so exhilarated and alive! I feel full of gratitude and I am proud of myself for doing something that was so scary.

I have spoken many times now in front of small and large groups of people and each time, I feel that same feeling. Those of you who know me may be surprised to know, I feel so scared. Haha well here is a little confession for you… when I left on my mission and had to speak at church, I was so nervous that I wrote my talk two months before and read it every day until it was memorized!! That is how scared I was! Fear is an interesting little element to life but holds a sweet secret to success.

For the most part I notice people shying away from experiences that elicit fear. And I am going to offer an interesting invitation, to do just the opposite!

Fear on a physical level is there to protect us and keep us healthy and safe (ie don’t jump off the roof bc I could get hurt). I am not talking about that fear. I am talking about the fear you feel, when you think about quitting your job, asking a girl out on a date, before an interview, an audition, starting a new career, travelling, falling in love, or anything else you want in your heart that you are afraid to actually go after! I want to talk about that fear!

Ask yourself what you really want? Think about it for a second…really contemplate what that is. Then ask yourself why you haven’t got it yet, why you are not doing that yet. You will begin to see little fears come forward. These fears will either be associated with the fear of failure, or the fear of success (and the responsibility that would come with that success).

What do you do in your life, when you feel fear? Do you quickly make up an excuse and sit back down into your seat of comfort? Or do you step out into the adventure of what you truly want? What is harder for you to give up, comfort or your dream? We cannot have comfort and follow our dreams at the same time. In order for us to follow our dreams, we have to take courage. Courage can only occur when fear is present, and we take a step forward regardless of how scared we feel!

Embrace fear! When you notice you feel fear in your life, let that be a signal to you, that you are about to do something you need to fulfill your dream! There is something at stake there, otherwise you wouldn’t feel scared! Let the fear show you that you are on the right path! And when you step into the darkness rather than freeze, run! RUN into the unknown with the faith you are doing exactly what you need to do, to get closer to fulfilling your dream!

It is not easy, but it is worth it. I know it is scary, and the fear will always be there, once you pass through one threshold a new one will soon arrive, letting you know the next step that must be taken. So get ready my friends, for the time of your lives! When all is said and done and you look back, what will you say you did? Played it safe or lived a life you loved?

Manifest your “Soul Mate”

Posted by on Feb 26, 2011 in Love, Uncategorized, Welcome to the Process | One Comment

For the last two weeks I have listened to the countries leading experts on finding your “soul mate”. I learned from psychologists, coaches, spiritual advisers, authors and therapists on how to attract and manifest the love of your life.

The content was rich and I learned a lot about myself and my own patterns. I want to share some of this information with you. Although it is difficult to summarize two weeks of knowledge and information, I have attempted to do so, in order to help the masses  also see where they may be struggling.

The obstacles to love exist in these 4 key areas:

– Your may have not let go of the past so you’re not really available for love in the present.

– You may have false limiting beliefs about yourself or about relationships that are unconsciously keeping love at bay.

– You may simply be out of sync with the opposite sex, the traits you’ve adopted in one area of your life to get ahead, could be ruining your chances for love.

– Or you just might not have learned the skills you need to play the dating game and win–dating is like a dance, and we all need to learn the steps.

So take a look at your own life and see if there are any improvements in any of these areas you are aware of you could work on. If you want help go ahead and comment and I’ll  coach you through it. Also check out the Dating Tips page, I recently added to it! I send you blessings on your love quest and hope this may enlighten you!

New Job Disclosed

Posted by on Feb 21, 2011 in Uncategorized, Welcome to the Process | No Comments

Today I am doing something very exciting and disclosing my most latest and greatest adventure a.k.a job, a.k.a the thing I do to pay for my cost of living.

Before I do so; however, I would like to play a little guessing game and let you try and figure out what it is exactly I am up to.

So here is your first clue…

I lay around all day.

Clue number two…

I bring comfort and support into your life.

Clue number three…

What I offer you comes with a 10- 20 year guarantee.

Have you figured it out yet? No? Okay one last hint…

Some would call me a sleep consultant.

Yup you guessed it, I am a mattress sales woman!

What? You seem a little surprised. Let me guess, right now you are asking yourself… Wait, didn’t Davia get a business degree from a university with a top ranked business school? Didn’t Davia just graduate with masters degree? Why is she selling mattresses? Isn’t she over qualified? Isn’t this what guys do who are not good enough to sell cars?

And the answer to all of those questions is yes.

So then why on earth would I do such a thing as seek out employment selling mattresses?

One simple reason…I needed a bed. For the last year and a half I have slept on the floor and I got well, tired of it.

I came into the mattress store a few months ago to buy a bed. Saw how expensive they were and thought “forget that” I don’t have an extra 2 grand to spend right now. So I did what any practical human being would do and applied to work at the place! Kill two birds with one stone. I get paid and get a discount on the thing I want; more money and a bed. I bought my new bed on Saturday so we will see what the next adventure may soon be! The moral of this story is when you want something bad enough you will get creative on how to get it! What do you want and what are you willing to do to make it happen?

Love

How many of us have wondered what this thing called love is? What is this feeling of romance that makes all things seem bright and full of life? Yet can suddenly depart, turning our lives upside down leaving us raw and abandoned. For most of my life love has remained a mystery.

For the last ten months I have been wrapped up in trying to understand what love is. Serious contemplation began as I suddenly felt myself slipping into what we refer to as romantic love. I was totally enchanted with the high of a relationship. At the same time as this euphoric bliss, I was crazy scared due to how vulnerable I felt. I was afraid that if he left, the love I felt would go away with him. This twisted combination of emotions left me feeling totally out of control. As I was desperately trying to get a grasp on it all, the relationship ended. I found myself on the flip side of love, dealing with the shock of heartache. How many of you know what I am talking about?

Many of us do as I did and misidentify love with the actual person. When they go so does the love…and we are left in a mess of emotions trying to find the next person to make us feel alive once again (that is if we have the courage to try again, many of us are too hurt over the first experience to give it another try and rather choose the safety of our loneliness).

Well here is a little secret to help save us from the woes of love lost. The truth is love never leaves us. It is impossible to leave. It is part of who we naturally are, a way of being. We just have to surrender into it. Love isn’t this mysterious force driving us without control. Rather is like a light-switch inside of us. We are the ones who choose to turn it on or off, but regardless of which way we put the switch it is always there like an unlimited source of energy. When we meet a certain special individual they only help us realize it is on within us.

The good feelings of being in love are not from the other person’s love, but rather our own love we are giving to them. We are feeling our own love! Does that make sense…when you are in love you are feeling what it feels like to give of YOUR love!

When you find yourself in that longing to find a lover this is only a revelation to you how you are separated from your own love source. You need to strengthen the connection to your own heart once again.

How else do we really think we can make a relationship work? Those of us who are unable to create love within us, and expect the other person to fulfill that for us will ALWAYS be let down and disappointed. Healthy relationships are made out of two whole individuals GIVING of their love. BOTH have to be giving. Seems like common sense, but I hear people over and over again saying he/she doesn’t love me how I want to be loved. They are concerned about how they are receiving the love rather than how they are giving it or if they are even giving it at all!

Find the magic in life that is all around you. Flowers, sunsets, and long walks are all equally as magical in and out of love, yet in love we find these things so much more beautiful. The real beauty comes from being able to enamor yourself. What do I mean? The real magic of love comes from being able to feel it regardless of who else is there to stimulate it within you. The secret is being able to create it within ourselves!

Love is who and what we are, it is a state of being we must seek after and develop. In order to feel love, one must love. In order to have a blessed life you must be a blessing. This means we give up the complaining of all the things we don’t have and create the lives we want, and as we do, appreciating the beauty of all that surrounds us! It means we make extraordinary out of the ordinary. It is an awesome journey and I invite you all to come along!

“Love is a state of being that does not rest upon external circumstances. Regardless of what is, or is not, happening around us, love is something that we generate from within ourselves.” -Katherine Woodward Thomas

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